Halloween, Begins and Ends.
But Have You Seen It High?
God I love weed.
I’ve been hesitant to write this blog for sometime, a mix of basic writer anxiety (what is the point of this? Will anyone read this besides my parents? Do people think it’s dumb? Did they laugh? Does this make any sense?) and a year of some pretty difficult times. But I need to write. It’s why I moved to NYC, it’s what keeps me happy and I can’t really make it as a writer if I don’t produce any content at all. Oh, but if someone could tap into my brain, there’s a lot of great ideas in there. Getting them structured and made into something, ehh.
And I’m now approaching a year since I got sick with something to do with my pancreas that is as yet diagnosed because the pancreas is a difficult organ to see and there’s not a *ton* of research on pancreatitis, but I have a lot of the symptoms but no test results confirming. A year ago, I was super tired ALL THE TIME. And just malaised. Like an 18th century woman living in a manor in the English countryside, succumbed to a mysterious plague. I lost a lot of weight. I thought my fatigue and malaise was just working as a nanny (exhausting) and lack of appetite was due to my new adderall prescription —except, as is the case with most folks who actually *need* adderall, I kept forgetting to take it and was only taking it once a week, so…
I lost weight more rapidly than I realized. The fatigue was not normal, even with the emotional and physical exhaustion of children accounted for. I went to bed at midnight on a Tuesday and did not wake up until Thursday at 8:30am. And I mean SLEPT. Not toss and turning and continuing to fall back asleep. I remember now looking back at that time, waking up and not being able to stay awake, even sometimes falling down from fatigue while I got ready for the day. And then I went to urgent care one morning and got confirmation (thankfully) that something serious was going on and I should start trying to figure it out. Well then it basically became like that situation where your car is making a funny noise or not working but when you take it the mechanic everything sounds and works fine.
Though I don’t have an *official* diagnosis, I believe something is wrong with my pancreas. All my symptoms match the symptoms listed on google.doctor.com, and it turns out pancreatitis is hard to diagnose, and many people undergo numerous tests and can have symptoms for years before being diagnosed. So basically my pancreas doesn’t make enough enzymes for me to digest food and get nutrients from said food. So I take enzyme supplements and have a lot of painful gas and bloating and an array of weird digestive issues of which I will spare you the details.
I’m sharing all of that more for myself, because, I’m working on acknowledging that I am SICK and not lazy, that I’m resting because I need to, not because I am a failure. And forgiving myself for staying in when I am le tired. October is my favorite time of the year, Spooky Season, horror movies, ghosts, Samhain*, all of it. I’ve been watching a horror movie per day, starting in September, and Oct 14th, Halloween Ends premiered on Peacock. (which has the best selection of horror movies on any streaming network).
(Okay yes, it’s “odd” that Samhain is pronounced Sow-ween, but it’s not an English word, colonizer. It’s an Irish word using the Irish alphabet. It’s a living language. And it’s the Irish word for November. )
So I decided to watch Halloween, the original, because I love it.
The edible is kicking in and I finally feel calm and a little bit hungry. And bombarded with a string of nonsensical, unrelated thoughts and ideas. I always forget how good of a film Halloween is. It’s not campy, it’s well written, Laurie Strode is this incredibly strong survivor, she’s not victimized, there’s “totally” hilarious dialogue. Okay…Mike Meyers breathing is honestly kind of soothing.
I think for non-horror fans, Halloween is an overlooked film. It’s a good movie. Not just good for a horror film. I didn’t really get into horror as much as I am now, til about 5 or 6 years ago, when I realized it was fun to watch something that cause me anxiety and fear rather than just feeling anxious about unreturned text messages or stupid stuff I said or did in my past. It lets me release those emotions.
The original Halloween is perfect, and I honestly think that should have been the last film, and Halloween III should just be its own standalone film. I mean props to John Carpenter for getting that franchise money. But I don’t really care about Halloween 2 because the storyline gets murky when you explain Michael Meyers as Laurie Strode’s brother in this convoluted way. It’s just unnecessary…you can have the reason he keeps coming back be because he wants to complete the kill. It’s scarier with him as a random slasher not someone with a vendetta. To be fair, I haven’t seen many of the sequels, and I haven’t watch the Rob Zombie remakes. But I think you know, the character of Michael Meyers and the Halloween franchise kind of became a joke of lol how will he not die this time? And it sours the image of the franchise as a whole, when the original film is just an honest to god good film with a plausible storyline and interesting psychological detective story, reminiscent of Psycho. The psychologist in Halloween is in fact takes the name of a character in Psycho, Sam Loomis. The psychologist scene is one of my favorites in Psycho, and Halloween just takes that vibe and extends it through the whole film.
Speaking of which, this performance by Donald Pleasence. My god.
Laurie Strode is peak me in high-school. A nerd, a babysitter, mildy stressing about leaving a chemistry book behind. I would have freaked out a little bit more. Maybe I should have smoked weed back then?
The most stoner/adhd thing about me is that recently I put my vapes into a little carry bag and put them somewhere and at the time I put them there said to myself “This is where I’ll keep my weed” and then…cannot for the life of me remember where I put them. “Somewhere safe” is where everything I love goes to die.
The edibles I have are making me feel toasty and calm and that sound of Michael Myers breathing is lulling me to sleep. Seriously this should be a setting on white noise machines (maybe it is brown noise or pink noise?) Noise is such weird word. If I think about how it’s spelled it feels weird pronouncing it. Does this even make sense?
It’s time to put my phone away and focus on the movie.
I honestly think Annie dropping her kid off with Laurie so she can have sex with her boyfriend is a dick move. Unless Annie pays Laurie for watching the kid.
One thing about pancreatitis or pancreatic insufficiency is that my body can’t handle fat very well, and so key snack choices have been fruit snacks lately and I just stocked up on them and boy oh boy am I glad I did.
This scene with Donald Pleasance standing by the bushes watching for Michael…I’m just saying if I saw an adult male in a trench coat just standing still behind a bush in a neighborhood full of children, I would be very worried. Once at a playground there was a man there playing handball by himself. At a playground. With children around. One of the park/playground rules is that you cannot enter the playground if you are an adult by yourself because DUH. The f*ck are you doing. Also you’re talking up an entire area where the kids play. I swear to God…
One of my favorite moments in this film is when “The Shape” (Michael Myers) wears a sheet as a ghost costume over the altered Captain Kirk mask. This dude is a creep ass mf, the way he stages the bodies after the murders. The way he finds enjoyment in the artistic representation of his murders.
Laurie does a kick ass job as a babysitter when all hell breaks loose. She remains calm, levelheaded and does not let the children see her get scared but doesn’t underplay the danger of the situation. When she needs them to listen, she enforces her voice and authority. This is why it’s important to not yell at children about every little thing. You become the adult who cried “danger”. The children know to listen and take her seriously. Once one of my nanny kids was playing with a glass of water, stirring a straw around it while she stood at the coffee table. I had a migraine but was keeping a close eye on her, when the glass fell off the table and shattered. I grabbed her and set her on the couch. “Stay there”. I said, “I’ll be right back”. She started to move after me, I looked back and said “Stay there” more sternly. I could see in her eyes that she was like “Oh shit, Gaga’s serious.” She was maybe a year then? It’s crazy what kids can understand. Jumping up to grab her and clean the glass magnified the pain of the migraine by 1000000% (way too much blood rushing to my head too quickly)
Wait what am I talking about? Oh yeah, Halloween. In this neighborhood, with what seems like a lot of children, no one is trick or treating? Later a character says something about having sooo many trick or treaters but there are no trick or treaters seen in this movie.
Fruit snacks are bae, but did you know how much work it is to eat a fruit roll-up? Wrapped in plastic like Laura Palmer.
Okay what makes the original work is that Laurie is played REAL. She’s not this strong shit talking “time to put the boogey-man to bed” caricature. She’s scared. She’s vulnerable. You can be both those things and be brave. In fact, most brave people are terrified and extremely vulnerable. The scene in the closet, perhaps one of the most memorable ones, Laurie sits cowering in the corner. She knows she doesn’t have much time, and much defense in the closet. She notices a wire hanger, unwinds it, and uses it to stab “The Shape” in the eye.
I never understood why they call him “The Shape”. Like we know who it is, it’s escaped mental patient Michael Myers…
Laurie is scared and shaken and still kicking ass, and that’s why this movie rules.
And I have to talk about the soundtrack. John Carpenter wrote all the music for this movie, and it’s simple but adds a complex layer to the film. It’s effective at amplifying the emotion of the film, without manipulating it. I say this all the time. But it’s something that when it works, it’s great, and when it doesn’t…it really sucks and immediately takes me out of the movie.
Alright, there’s gotta be a youtube video that’s just a loop of Michael Meyers breathing that I can fall asleep to. FOUND IT!
Thanks for reading! Please like/comment/share, it helps me gain readers but more so gives me encouragement to keep doing these.
Ah god dammit. I forgot to write about Halloween Ends. There’s four writers on this screenplay and that is way too many cooks in the kitchen. Danny McBride is one of the writers and it’s fun to guess which scenes he wrote. In this 2022 Halloween rendition, Laurie is a mature women who has fully healed from a life of the trauma of being almost murdered every few years. The movie opens with Laurie reading from the memoir she’s writing, which uuuugggggh god is the laziest form of writing. GOD HELP YOU IF YOU USE VOICEOVER, MY FRIENDS. GOD HELP YOU.
It’s a cheap way to cover exposition and come on, no one is going into Halloween Ends blind. As I mentioned earlier, Laurie’s vulnerability in the first movie is what makes it relatable and what makes it good. You can put yourself in Laurie’s place. Yes, you would probably be scared shitless if someone was trying to murder you. But you can be resilient in spite of vulnerability and fear. People do it all the time and it’s incredible. The people who are outwardly shit talkers who think nothing can scare them, are probably the biggest cowards. I have a disdain for action movies because I hate the dumb phrases people say before they are about to kill someone (except for this scene from Con-Air):
Laurie doesn’t say anything dumb when she’s 16 in the first film, but at mindyobusiness years old she’s ready to “Put the Boogeyman to bed!” And it doesn’t work. Forced badassery isn’t badass. It’s lame. And I’m not sure how I feel about the scene where she attempts suicide, only to have Michael bust in and her say “Yeah, right, you thought I would kill myself?” because that’s kind of offensive? I may be reaching or stretching here but it just seems odd to put that in the movie, like was Michael Myers watching her? To the audience it seemed she was in a room by herself…also I was high and not paying attention.
October is over and now it is Samhain which is Irish for November which is known as “Noirvember” in cinema nerd land, so I’ll be switching to watching a bunch of Noir films now.
Okay, now. Thanks for reading!